Imagine Elon Musk, the modern Prometheus, descending from the Olympus of Silicon Valley wrapped in a Santa Claus suit, not to hand out toys, but to deliver miracle pills that promise to save humanity from obesity. His white beard and enigmatic smile are a nod to a tradition that he, true to his style, dismantles and reinvents with irony. This Christmas Musk does not bring reindeer, but chemical formulas and clichés that buzz like flies on social networks.
“Like Cocaine Bear, but Santa and Ozempic,” he writes on his X platform, while posing with a mischievous air. Ozempic, Mounjaro, Wegovy… names that sound more like planets discovered by NASA than medicines, but in their universe they acquire the dimension of tools of progress. Musk, who has never hidden his disdain for the gym, confesses that he uses Mounjaro to stay slim, ruling out Ozempic because, according to him, it made him “burp and fart like Barney from The Simpsons.” The anecdote, apparently trivial, actually contains the entire spirit of his character: a mixture of genius, jester and market strategist.
Musk’s paradox and the weight of modernity
Musk is not a simple consumer of Mounjaro. His enthusiasm for GLP-1 inhibitors, originally designed for diabetes control, is part of a larger narrative that he feeds. According to the magnate, these drugs represent the most efficient solution to the obesity epidemic that plagues the United States. His proposal challenges the positions of figures such as Robert F. Kennedy Jr., appointed Secretary of Health, who advocates a more traditional solution: educating Americans to eat better.
While Kennedy, with his aura of a nostalgic crusader, preaches a return to fresh foods and moderate portions, Musk represents the antithesis: a world in which technology not only makes life easier, but also corrects excess. For him, pills are the logical shortcut in a system where time is the most precious commodity.
The cult of image in the Musk era
Musk’s statement comes at a time when public figures are increasingly embracing chemistry as a tool for transformation. Whoopi Goldberg, for example, has revealed that she lost almost 300 pounds thanks to Mounjaro, enthusiastically declaring on The View: “Elon is right!” The comedian, like Musk, is a living testimony of a society that looks in the mirror with disdain and looks for quick solutions instead of facing its own lack of discipline.
At heart, Musk is not a wellness evangelist, but an accomplished storyteller who turns his every move into a spectacle. In the end, his image as “Ozempic Santa” is just another episode in his endless series of modern fictions. While some are outraged and others applaud, Musk continues forward, like the captain of a ship that navigates between satire and prophecy, without caring too much whether the destination is real or imaginary.
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