From her abortion with Justin Timberlake to the reason for her famous shave: Britney Spears confesses like never before in her new book

Britney Spears is about to publish his long-awaited autobiography, The woman that I am, a book in which he opens up like never before about the experiences that have marked his life. In an interview with Peoplethe singer has advanced some of the topics she addresses in her pages, such as the abortion she underwent during her relationship with Justin Timberlake in 2000 or the reason why he shaved his head some time later.

The American magazine has not only spoken with the artist, but has also published an excerpt from the book, which will hit bookstores on October 24. In it there are confessions that, in Spears’ words, her fans “deserve to hear directly” from her. And among these, the abortion that she went through when she was around 20 years old has drawn special attention, after Timberlake showed her her insecurities with the idea of ​​being her father.

A consensual abortion

“Justin was not at all happy with the pregnancy. He said that we were not ready to have a baby in our lives, that we were too young,” says the singer, 41, in her memoirs. The two began their relationship in 1999, when she was 17 years old and he was 18. Their breakup came in 2002, the year in which things were already beginning to go wrong in the life of the young promise.

The singer had hopes of building a common project with the performer, but this did not happen: “I loved Justin very much. I always hoped that one day we could have a family. This happened much sooner than I had anticipated,” she says in the book. , where she assures that the pregnancy, far from being “a tragedy”, was “a surprise” for her.

So much so that, if it hadn’t been for Timberlake, she would have dared to become a mother. “If it had been up to me alone, he never would have done it. But Justin was pretty sure he didn’t want to be a father,” he explains. As time goes by, she remembers the abortion as “one of the most painful experiences” of a life full of ups and downs, marked by the consequences of fame and the guardianship of her father. He now says he has recovered “freedom”, something he has fought for for 13 years.

Shaving to shout ‘enough’

One of the ways that the singer had to rebel – or, in other words, to ask for help against the pressure to which she had been subjected for years – was her famous shave. Suddenly, one day, Britney said goodbye to her long hair to show off a radical change of look. The photograph of the young woman leaving a store showing the new image of her at 25 years old is very popular. In some ways, she was rebelling.

She also talks about this in the book: “I had been in the spotlight growing up. I was looked up and down, I had people telling me what they thought of my body since I was a teenager. Shaving my head and acting out was my way of fighting back. “But under tutelage I was made to understand that that stage was over. I had to let my hair be long and give it shape. I had to go to bed early and take the medication they told me.”

An eternal and ‘crazy’ girl

The singer was tired of being infantilized. She wanted to be seen as a woman, so her “adult self” had to “step up.” The woman in me was repressed for a long time. On stage they wanted me to be wild, they called me, and the rest of the time, a robot.” This was the moment of “the death” of her “creativity as an artist.” Many questioned her behavior. The stigma of being ‘crazy’ was already heavy. about her.

When she began to be tutored by her father – who she says called her “fat”, among other things – things got worse. “The guardianship stripped me of my adult self, it made me a child again. On stage I became more of an entity than a person. I had always felt music in my blood, and they stole that from me. If they had let me live my own life I know that I would have followed my heart and come out of this in the best way, it would have worked.

A freedom with a bittersweet taste

It was at the end of 2021 when Britney felt free for the first time in a long time. Judge Brenda Penny immediately ordered the end of legal guardianship. His life has never been the same, and this change, he acknowledges, has been good, but also overwhelming: “I have had to build a completely different identity. I have had to say: ‘Wait, this is what I was, passive and accommodating. A girl. And this is what I am, someone strong and confident. A woman.”

There are things that still cost him – “Not having a moment of peace, the trials of people who don’t know me, my family and the Government taking away my freedom, and losing my passion for the things I love” – ​​but now She is willing to give explanations. And what better way to do it than from her own pen: “No more conspiracies, no lies, just me in possession of my past, my present and my future.”